Everyone Knows It's Windy

Eli was on the hunt for some tennis shoes so we headed to Dundrum Town Centre this morning.  Or rather, we blew all the way to Dundrum Town Centre this morning.  It's extremely windy here at times - today being one of those times.  I had to hold my headband to the top of my head for fear the wind would snatch it away.  I'm going to have to pull my hair back into a ponytail or something because looking like Cousin Itt isn't great when you're trying to navigate stairs.

We journeyed to three or four different stores inside the mall but had no success.  For whatever reason, it's very difficult to find wide-width shoes in stores here.  Eli and I both got some winter gloves, and I found a raincoat.  It may shock you to learn that it rains here in Ireland.  A lot.  And I didn't have a medium-weight, waterproof coat so it was nice to remedy that today.

Holiday shopping is in full swing so the mall was full of people and noise and lights.  Not my idea of a swell time, by any stretch of the imagination.  I managed to pass by the bookstore without being drawn in by its siren song.  Please clap for me.

We tried a new restaurant for lunch - one I had suggested.  I know - shocking!  I tend to stick with the tried-and-true places so for me to both be willing to try something new and to have been the one to suggest it was a pretty big deal.

The bells of the church down the street had just rung 12, so I was afraid that the place might be full.  Happily, we walked in and there were only a couple people there.  It probably helped that the restaurant is in a little alley a block or two from the mall entrance so they probably don't have a lot of foot traffic.  Or at least they didn't today.  Business did pick up a few minutes after we arrived.

Nando's is a South African multinational fast casual chain that specializes in Portuguese flame-grilled peri-peri style chicken (description from their Wikipedia page).  If you know me, you know that about the only word I'm comfortable/familiar with in that sentence - culinarily speaking - is chicken.

Not knowing if we should wait or seat ourselves, we stood by the door and the hostess approached with a smile.  She asked if we'd been there before and, when we said we hadn't, explained how to order (either using a QR code or going up to the counter), pointed out where the drink station was, and also asked if we had any food allergies.

Eli ordered a mushroom and halloumi pitta with sides of broccoli and chips (aka fries) along with a hard cider; he also had an appetizer of spiced olives.  I got chicken butterfly (grilled chicken breast) with sides of mac/cheese and garlic bread along with a bottomless glass of Coke.  And it was soooooo good!  The garlic bread was soft on the bottom/middle but crispy on top and had a great garlic flavor.  The mac/cheese was very thick and creamy.  The chicken was tender and coated with peri-peri sauce, which tasted to me like a sweet BBQ sauce.

We didn't save room for dessert but if we had, I was eyeing the bottomless tub of soft-serve vanilla ice cream.  Doesn't that sound wonderful??

The staff came over multiple times to ask if we needed anything else, always with a smile and always so pleasant.  There was music playing but it wasn't so loud and obnoxious that we couldn't hold a conversation.

All in all, it was a really good meal and good experience.

I will leave you with a few more bits and bobs of random stuff:

- Rather than stocking stuffers, these items are called stocking fillers.

- You do your grocery shop or Christmas shop - not shopping.

- Underwear is called knickers.

- A basket is a hamper - so a gift basket would be a gift hamper.

- Sweaters are jumpers - e.g. I'm wearing my ugly Christmas jumper.

Pod People

Eli's birthday fell mid-week, so we celebrated yesterday by going to a restaurant at the Carrickmines mall called The Vanilla Pod.

It was a very grey day, and the sky was quite close to the ground.  There was a constant drizzle - enough to make you damp but not really make you wet.  I felt a little like produce in the grocery store when the mister jets engage.

We got to the mall a few minutes past noon.  The restaurant opened at noon, and there was already a line out the door.  We stood for a few minutes before deciding to do our shopping, hoping that when we returned, the place would've cleared out.

Our shopping quest was for salt and pepper shakers.  I had ordered some from Ikea but for whatever reason, those couldn't be shipped to us.  Don't ask me to explain it because I can't.  One of the home stores we went to had a Pier 1 mood - lots of cute holiday paraphernalia with fabric reindeer and fluffy seasonal blankets, with a pleasant scent of spices in the air.  You wouldn't think salt and pepper shakers would be hard to find, but you'd be wrong.  We eventually found some and went on our way.

Since we had time to kill, we went into a store called Woodie's.  It's basically Menards with housewares, tools, gardening stuff, paint, etc.  I had seen online that they carry rubbing alcohol (it's like a unicorn - you can't find it here very easily and when you do, it's mega expensive) but we didn't find it after wandering around.  Eli did get a tea ball though so it wasn't a complete waste.  Plus, as I told him, it was nice to see what types of items they have, in case we need something in the future.

Stopped at a pharmacy called Boots which is much like Ulta. They didn't have the products I was looking for but again, it was nice to make a reconnaissance ramble to see what they have on offer.

Back to The Vanilla Pod we went.  There was still a line, but it was shorter and moved along very quickly.  The three parties ahead of us were seated in short order and then it was our turn.

Eli had a pasta dish with an elderberry lemonade; I had a pepperoni pizza with a Coke.  Everything was very good - and very expensive, but that's the way things are everywhere, not just here.   My only complaint was that it was quite loud, making it hard to have a conversation.  In psychology, "the cocktail party effect" happens when you're surrounded by external stimuli but can still focus on something - e.g. you're in a loud restaurant but are able to focus on the conversation you're having with one person.  I have the opposite issue - if I'm surrounded by voices, I can focus on none of them.

Eli wanted to visit a mall in Dun Laoghaire which is accessible by bus.  The bus stop is right across from the tram stop, so he went to stand by the bus stop sign while I went to wait for the tram.  Even though I wasn't planning to ride the bus, I was apparently close enough to have an effect since it was late.  🙄  But eventually it arrived and eventually the tram arrived, and we both got to where we wanted to be.

Finding Balance

I can be grateful for all I have while also feeling grief for all I've lost.  Dr. Joanne Cacciatore

There was a post on Facebook where the author stated that his family was going to move to Ireland, and he wondered about the issue of homesickness - if people experienced it and how they handled it.

I had been thinking about writing a post like this for a while and answering his question on Facebook helped to bring sharper focus to my thoughts.

It may sound woo-woo or whatever, but the harmonics of this place, the energy, isn't compatible for me at the moment.  I've told people that I feel like a tree that's been transplanted into foreign soil - my roots are reaching out for something familiar but nothing feels "right" or comfortable.

No matter where I traveled in Minnesota, it always felt like home.  The surroundings, even when physically different, were the same somehow.  Here, things feel a bit off - like a radio station that isn't quite tuned in.  I don't remember having this much trouble acclimating when I moved to Texas but then again, I was 30 years younger and the circumstances were different so it isn't an apt comparison.

I have a feeling the lack of definite seasons is also going to be difficult for me.  I NEED that delineation and, as was the case in Texas, I just don't think that's going to happen here.

In Minnesota, we lived in a house surrounded by trees/grass, and we had daily visits from all manner of wildlife - birds, squirrels, deer, bunnies.  Here, our balcony looks onto a small courtyard but there are so many hard surfaces and not much greenery.  Considering I draw comfort from nature, the lack of it when I look out the window isn't helpful.

Coloring this entire experience is also the fact that I'm carrying a lot of grief over Lissa.  My move to Ireland would've put her over the damned moon.  She would've been so thrilled for me, so eager to hear about my adventures.  Maybe she would've been able to visit, and we could've sat in a Dublin pub, listening to traditional music, she with a pint of Guinness or a shot of Jameson's in her hand, her Irishness coming home for a little while.  Everything I experience here at the moment has a sour taste of regret.

However hard this has been at times, I'm giving myself the gift of grace.  We haven't even been here for three months yet which is a drop in the ocean compared to being in Minnesota for over 50 years.  I don't expect my homesickness to ever fully disappear but I think that the longer I'm here, the more comfortable I'll feel.

As I write all of this, there's a part of me that gets irritated by all of the doom and gloom and complaining. I've been given this incredible gift but rather than finding gratitude, all I can find is sorrow.  But as the quote at the top of this post reminds me, life is not about absolutes.  Grief and gratitude, gain and loss, joy and sadness - all of these things can co-exist, and that's okay.

More Random Stuff

The wheels on the grocery carts are multi-directional so when you want to go from the middle of the aisle to a spot closer to the shelves, you just push your cart sideways.  It took me a while to get the hang of maneuvering - the first few times, I was weaving all over the place.  I appreciate the difference though - so much better than having those static wheels.

Caps on bottles are tethered to the neck of the bottle after you open them.  This is to help more caps be recycled (when they detach, they're sometimes too small/light for the recycling equipment to handle and they wind up as non-recycled waste).  Bottle rings are also harmful to wildlife so this keeps them attached to the container.  It was an adjustment to get accustomed to these caps but now, it's no big deal. 

There are a couple of tram stops that are near a park-and-ride.  When we approach those stops, the announcement tells passengers to "alight here for park-and-ride."  Not depart or get off, but alight.

Tram/bus stops are announced both in English and in Irish.  It's interesting because some of the towns sound different depending on the language - Carrickmines is Carraig Mhaighin and Cherrywood is Coill na Silini in Irish.  But then there are places like Cowper which are pronounced and spelled...Cowper.

The tub/showers in our apartment have two handles.  One knob turns the water on and controls the flow; the other one controls the temperature.  You don't have one knob for cold and one knob for hot.

Eggs are found on the shelf at the store and not refrigerated.  That wigged me out a bit because my only experience with store-bought eggs was getting them from the fridge section.  But I've eaten some (and Eli's been eating them hard-boiled for a while) and haven't dropped dead so I guess they're okay.

Take-out is called take-away.

The windows don't have screens on them.  The apartment advises to open your windows every now and again.  And have all the bugs inside?  No thank you.

Band-Aids are called plasters.

Random Stuff

At least in the couple of restaurants we've gone to here, they use paper straws.  Pretty cool.

Feminine hygiene products have been available for free in every public restroom I've been in, and I don't hear anyone bitching about it.

At the libraries here, you use the check-out computer to also return your books.  At the library in Elk River, I would drop my books in the return slot and the library staff would check them in.

The Eire/postal code is you-specific.  For example, our postal code is D18 YN2F (Dublin is split into districts, and we're in district 18).  Whereas ZIP codes cover a particular region, Eire codes are each for a specific address.  I don't know if they have it set up this way because they don't have house numbers?  We live on Cherrywood Avenue but there's no house number (i.e. 1234 Main Street) associated with it.

We had our immigration appointments back in August, and INS mailed our cards to us - only to have them returned (the postal code they used was D22-something, which isn't even close to our postal code so something got messed up at INS during data entry).  Eli picked his up a week or so ago.  He had the day off yesterday, and we took the train into city centre so I could get mine.  Oddly enough, your IRP (Irish Residence Permit) card shows you are legally allowed to be in Ireland but despite the fact that it has your photo, DOB, and full name....you can't use it as identification.

We finally got a bank account established here and received our ATM cards.  Anytime I've ever gotten a new credit card or whatever, I've had to call a number to activate it.  With these ATM cards, we activated them by simply using them.

Speaking of credit cards, about a week after we moved, Bank of America sent us new credit cards because our current ones expire in October.  We had a forwarding address on our mail, so they were redirected to my mom.  She sent them, along with Eli's new debit card from the bank, to us in mid-August.  I don't know what else she sent, but she put everything into a regular manila envelope.  No problem, right?  Yeah, problem.  It only took about four days to go from Minnesota to Ireland....and then it sat at a facility in Ireland for a while.  And then it got sent back to Minnesota just a few days ago and was showing it was in Minneapolis.  I thought perhaps it was being returned to Mom for whatever reason.  NOPE!  It's currently in Chicago again.  What the actual fuck?

Most bottled products are part of a return scheme ("scheme" here means "plan" or "process" - I'm used to it meaning something shady or duplicitous so that's taken some getting used to).  You get charged a deposit fee (usually around 15-50 cents) when you buy it, but you can return the empty bottle and get a voucher that refunds the fee.  Most convenience and grocery stores here have the return machines so it isn't a big deal.  You have to use the voucher in the same store - if you don't think you're going to buy something there, you can cash it out. 

Curses....Foiled Again

In one of my recent posts, I talked about how we had planned to go to Killiney via bus.  There's an An Post (post office) in the shopping mall there, and we wanted to mail our ballots.  And then our scheduled bus got cancelled, and we wound up going somewhere else (but not the post office).

Today, we planned to go to Killiney via bus so we could drop off our ballots at An Post....and our scheduled bus got cancelled.  😡  I told Eli that the bus seems to hate me because he never seems to have these issues when he's traveling alone.

We noticed there's an An Post in Dundrum, which is on the train line, so we walked over and got on the tram.

Got our ballots mailed, got some stamps, ate at McDonald's, got a few things at the grocery store, and came back home.

Eli decided he wanted to go to Dun Laoghaire (pronounced doon leery), which is accessible via bus.  I told him, "I'm sure the bus will be on time, and you'll be served champagne and caviar, and everyone will get a puppy."

He sent me a text a few minutes after he left:  "Of course, I'm on the bus."  My response:  "I pretty much hate you right now."

Bits and Bobs

I haven't been a very good correspondent regarding my new life in Ireland so I thought I'd best pop in with a new post.

Over the weekend, we wanted to visit a shopping center in Killiney, which is about 15-20 minutes away by bus.  Patrick had been to the vet on Friday for possible full anal glands (it happens to him a lot), and he was so upset by the entire process that the vet didn't want to continue.  She prescribed gabapentin for him, and we made another appointment for this past Monday.

There's a pharmacy and SuperValu at the mall in Killiney, plus it's somewhere we haven't been yet, so we decided to head there.

This is where we again have to learn how to adapt to the transportation system here.

We saw there was a bus leaving our stop at 12:30 so we hustled to get out there and arrived in plenty of time.  Minutes went by with no bus.  Eli got on his phone and checked the schedule to see if it were delayed.  It was delayed - and by delayed, I mean cancelled, with the next bus not due to arrive until 1.

Since we had a good 15 minutes to kill before the next bus, we walked around to the bus stop that's in front of our building, a distance past the tram stop.  That bus stop is the beginning/ending of the route, and we hoped the 1 p.m. bus wouldn't also be canceled.

So we're standing there, and a young couple walks up to the bus stop.  They began to have a lovers' spat right there in public, not bothering to keep their voices down.  I wanted to go over to Sophie and Jack (I know that was their names because they said it a million times back and forth) and say, "Hey, All My Children - no one wants to listen to this soap opera so pipe down."  But they wouldn't have understood the reference, and I'm from Minnesota and we don't do confrontation, so it didn't happen.

The tram was sitting at the stop, waiting for a few minutes before it would head back out.  I told Eli I didn't want to listen to these dopes arguing on the bus, so we trekked over to the tram and rambled our way to the retail district in Leopardstown.

After dropping off Patrick's prescription, we went to the Dunne's grocery store that was right next door to the pharmacy.  Dunne's is a department store (like Target/Kohl's) and some of their locations have a full-blown grocery.  Y'all, if you can be star-struck by a grocery store, I was star-struck.  The deli counter stretched for days with all kinds of hot and cold fare.  There was also an in-store meat counter, and they had sides of beef hung and rotating at the back of the room.

We wandered around a bit and bought a few things before heading back to the pharmacy.  The techs were having trouble finding the filled prescription and finally went to ask the pharmacist about it.  He kinda smiled and said, "This was for Patrick, right?"  Instead of having my name on the bag, they had Patrick's name.  😼

Yesterday, Patrick had his second vet visit in the span of four days.  For the first visit, we had taken a taxi to and from the clinic - the clinic isn't even a mile away, and it cost €30 (which is over $40).  For the visit last night, Eli walked there - it was a nice evening, and it's only about 10 minutes away.  He said that Patrick didn't seem to mind the trip at all.

We had given Patrick a dose of gabapentin before the visit, but the vet gave him some other sedative as well because he wanted to do a more in-depth examination of his glands, which would've been painful and stressful.  He thinks Patrick might have an infection, so he gave him a shot of antibiotic.  In all, Patrick had four shots (one antibiotic, one sedative, one pain killer, and one sedative-reverser), got his glands expressed, and had his nails trimmed - and it only cost €93.  Just walking into our vet in Elk River would cost $60 or $70 - and then another $300 for the treatment.

Hopefully we won't have to go back to the vet any time soon.

In other news, we got a delivery of our belongings back on September 7.  I have been through most of the boxes, and everything looks to have arrived in good shape.  I know why these moves are so expensive:  because the moving company uses ALL THE TAPE AND PAPER while wrapping items.  Seriously, I'm grateful they take care to ensure your possessions are protected, but geesh.  The cats are in heaven because we're saving some of big sheets of white paper they used to cushion some items.  We spread out a few sheets on the extra bed, and they've had a blast playing with it.

I had hoped that having some familiar things around me would help soften my psyche and make me feel more at home.  It's helped but I'm still feeling adrift, like I don't belong, like I don't fit in here.  I know that going out and about would help me feel more integrated - but I need to feel more integrated before I feel comfortable going out and about.  I've got a real Catch-22 going on here that I hope to break out of as the days pass.  I need to keep reminding myself that we've only been here a little over a month, and that's not a lot of time.

I haven't been able to sleep well since we got here.  I think I've had maybe two nights where I've slept about five hours.  Otherwise, I go to sleep around 9:30 and wake up at midnight or 1 a.m., completely wide awake.  It's more annoying than anything right now but only because I don't yet have a job, and I can take a nap if needed.  I don't know if it's because I know I'm in a different environment or what, but I hope I get acclimated soon.

It's my birthday in a couple days, but I'm so discombobulated that I've had a tough time focusing on the fact that it's coming up.  I haven't quite decided what I want to do to celebrate.  Eli has an appointment for his PPS number (like a Social Security number) on Thursday morning, so we'll probably get out and do something.  I'd like to go to the library in Dundrum and maybe wander around the big mall there.  Eli's taking off Thursday and Friday so perhaps on Friday, we'll head to Bray so I can visit the beach.

I'm already looking for other places to live, even though I think we might be stuck here for a year since our lease doesn't have a break clause.  I want to get a house with more windows and a small yard - basically so the cats have things to look at.  At the house in Minnesota, there were birds and squirrels and chipmunks and bunnies and deer around all the time, and it gave the cats some enrichment and stimulation.  Here, the windows we have look out into the courtyard, and there's not much there to see.  I feel like we're on top of each other in this tiny apartment, and it bothers me that I don't have my own space.  There are some good things about this apartment, but I can't see staying here for longer than a year.  Fortunately, another move won't be quite as horrific - or at least I would HOPE it wouldn't be.

The weather here has been a revelation.  Eli was tickled because even when the national weather service says there's a 0% chance of rain, that just means it might rain a little and be over quickly.  Currently, it's sunny and 64 degrees, which is leaps and bounds better than the nasty weather Minnesota is getting at the moment.